To Make a Good Thing Better
If you don't find the missionary position satisfying, you may need to fine-tune it. One or two hard pillows under your hips, tipping your pelvis up for deeper penetration, can make all the difference. Your husband can ride high or low, leaning back to watch or forward to whisper and kiss. You can straighten your legs to create more tension or spread them wide or, if you're fit, wrap them around his waist or put one or both over his shoulders. He can hold your arms above your head or, still with your arms above your head, you can grip the headboard and thrust back at him. (Who said the missionary position had to be submissive?) He can lean to one side so you can caress each other's genitals.
To guarantee even deeper penetration with the missionary position, New York psychiatrist Avodah Offit, M.D., author of The Sexual Self, suggests a slight variation: "Pull your knees up to your chest, then spread them just wide enough for your husband to get between them. With your calves on either side of his back, support his weight on the backs of your thighs. If you want to move you can rock back and forth with him."
"The advantage of this position," says Dr. Offit, "is that you don't have to be particularly supple. Taking his weight in this way also gives you some control, and orgasm is easier because penetration is deeper than if your legs are straight or out to the sides." But, she cautions, you do have to be shaped for it. Some couples just aren't built to fit for this, so there's no one prescription. But you're most likely to get maximum benefit from the missionary position if you start practicing those old Kegels again. "Kegel exercises alone can aid orgasm," says Dr. Offit. "Or you can bear down, pressing your vaginal lips and clitoris toward the man's body." Even better, she suggests, is doing the two movements together, which tightens the whole of the vagina.
ByRedbook
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